All in my head.


I don’t remember our first meeting

Not because you were weird or just some random person

But simply because I wasn’t in the mood

For making new friends or connections.


You noticed me and the fact I didn’t notice you

Gave u the audacity to come closer to me

Subtly, you made your way into my life

And now we share good memories.


You had a few things I looked for in a friend

That prayerful side to always push me forward

That funny side to always keep me smiling

That crazy side to remind me to live fully.


We had a great friendship, I loved it

Till you decided to confide in me

One of your deepest secrets, why? Good question

But I simply listened with great attention.


I saw you almost drowning, breaking, giving in

To the thoughts, the wants, the feelings

I couldn’t stand the sight of you giving up

So I tried saving you…and I failed.


Now I’m hurt, deeply and I cried

Because you didn’t listen, you didn’t wait, you didn’t try

I break my mind just trying to understand why

And now I just stare, wondering if I was ever useful.


Did you think of how I’ll feel?

If it’ll mean a thing to me?

If I deserved that? If I wanted that?

I guess this is what they call “friendship pain”.


I can’t undo what’s been done

It’s your life and you made your choice

I just wish I didn’t know what I know now

Cuz I’m left with this feeling, this burden

I thought I could convince or even help you

I guess I’m gonna stick to the raw truth

It was all in my head.

Sammy J.


8 thoughts on “All in my head.

  1. I could relate to it. There are times when we don’t feel like making new bonds. It’s not because of arrogance but it’s just we don’t want to.
    But we can’t control what others are going to confide in us and the moment they do, you feel special along with feeling burdened.
    Wonderfully written. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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