In order to heal, we must first forgive and sometimes the person we must forgive is ourselves.
Some days your past comes knocking at your door and it presents you memories. Some good, some bad but most often we dwell in the bad ones. We recapture all our mistakes and start wondering what we could have done differently. We weigh in all the ‘what ifs ‘ and ‘maybes’. We even let those mistakes define us. We hate ourselves. Well, this poem is a reminder for you to forgive yourself because who you were yesterday is in no way near the person you are today.
For so long I let my sins eat me raw
I watched myself drown in an ocean of tears
I was overshadowed by a cloud of guilt
What happened to me?
The person whose heart was filled with hope, resilience and love?
My dreams all went away together with pieces of me.
I settled, I forgot who I was.
I trembled, at the simple thought of closing my eyes at night.
I battled, with insecurities and endless thoughts.
My heart beat so loud it could be heard across the hall.
All the voices reminding me of my mistakes.
Laughing, judging, telling me I will never be
And I sat in my dirt, in my own shit.
I let all of that happen and did nothing!
So come to think of it, I was the enemy.
It was me, my thoughts, my fears, my shortcomings, my imperfections,
My doubts, my unbelief, my assumptions
It was all in my head.
But today, I put them all to bed!
Shut out all the voices, driven all the demons.
I’m taking control of my life.
No more settling.
No more doubting myself.
No more sleepless nights and emotional rides.
No more worrying.
No more lies.
No more lying to self.
No more hurting.
I forgive me…
For being hard on myself.
For thinking I was never good enough.
For not believing in myself.
For not loving myself the way I should have.
For blaming and dwelling in my past.
For falling in love with the dark.
For letting my mistakes define me.
For not taking care of my heart, soul and body.
I am worthy!
I need me now more than ever.
Hey guys, sometimes you just look at the past and certain decisions you made when you want to hate yourself for those but no. You need to understand everything needed to happen for you to be who you are today. So free yourself from all the guilt and pain and live now.